I tentatively side-stroke toward the Paradisus pool bar in Cancun. It’s packed with spring-breakers eager for their cocktails. It’s all inclusive. Translation: It’s already paid for. I can drink for free. I can do this. I will get my diet soda and glide away. Easy breezy. There—six inches …
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Blog
Page 4
Reflections from a recovering human
Where are those magic words? Those words that let the reader know I understand. I understand where you are, but if you can just trust there is another way, I promise there is. Active alcoholism, especially when in it, is the worst kind of torture. Non-addicts have no …
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I remember the day I decided to stop drinking. I honestly thought it might be a little challenging, maybe even uncomfortable, but it never genuinely crossed my mind that it was going to be difficult—near impossible. I still believed I was a normal drinker and normal drinkers can …
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Spirituality is a controversial topic in general, but a particularly heated topic for newly recovering addicts. If I am a believer it’s a non-issue. If I’m not a believer it can make or break my future. Do I need to see to believe or do I believe to …
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I love drinking. Drinking makes me feel better. Drinking is the answer. Drinking is the question. Drinking is fun. I’m more interesting when I’m drinking. Alcohol is only a problem when there isn’t enough. Life is better with a drink. My family loves it when I’m drinking.
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Last week’s post comment, via ByeByeBeer, spurred this post on the Pendulum. The Pendulum is a staple in my toolbox. When I first got sober I was under the illusion that I was going to actually rid myself of my yuckier side. I did rid myself of …
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I can picture no element of gratitude. I feel insignificant, bleak—dare I say annulled. There is no half-full or half-empty because there is no glass. There is no leap, for I have no wings. I was mistaken. I cannot make sobriety work for me. She asks me to …
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Now that we are half way into January most of us are clearer on the effort that goes into making a change. For me, change comes down to two choices: elimination or moderation. In most all cases I have gone for moderation first. After all, why totally remove …
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Like much of humanity I have believed aesthetic beauty as real beauty. And by beauty I mean (shamefully) more worthy. As if a thing is more loveable because it possesses appeal. Sight, via my eyes, was my pathway to beauty or lack of. My longing to be visually …
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A big block in my recovery from alcohol addiction (and addictions that followed) was deciphering the difference between seeing the situation for what it really was versus seeing the situation for how I hoped it was. Looking back I can see that I was more or less under …
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