It’s just not enough to “want to change.” Want. It’s a word that leaves me hanging for more. It’s a perpetual state of never having—just longing. All my positive affirmations and wanting, as of late, have only produced more wanting and more longing. On the tail end of …
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Recovery Coaching
As a coach by occupation and a spiritual seeker by nature I find my world is riddled with more questions than answers. Even when I find an answer it begets more questions. I am learning to acquiesce to this apparently never ending cycle of learning. But I’m not …
Read more →Somehow, somewhere, someway, I have felt that Creator has forgotten about me. While I know (in the truest part of me) this is not possible, I have still fallen prey to this mindset on more than one occasion this past month. The culmination of an ant infestation, an …
Read more →Pain—an ache from which I seek relief. Pain—a feeling to be avoided. Pain—a thing I had hoped could be eliminated. There is this illusion that a sober life will be a pain free life; I will eventually arrive at this sunny place of completeness accompanied by a pain-free …
Read more →Tomorrow marks my son’s 14th birthday. He has been my greatest teacher. I wonder all these moments who was teaching whom. He brought me curiosity, creativity, wonder, discipline, courage, and the longing for more of life. Both my kids were paramount reasons for ending the ‘chaos of drinking’. …
Read more →I tentatively side-stroke toward the Paradisus pool bar in Cancun. It’s packed with spring-breakers eager for their cocktails. It’s all inclusive. Translation: It’s already paid for. I can drink for free. I can do this. I will get my diet soda and glide away. Easy breezy. There—six inches …
Read more →Where are those magic words? Those words that let the reader know I understand. I understand where you are, but if you can just trust there is another way, I promise there is. Active alcoholism, especially when in it, is the worst kind of torture. Non-addicts have no …
Read more →I remember the day I decided to stop drinking. I honestly thought it might be a little challenging, maybe even uncomfortable, but it never genuinely crossed my mind that it was going to be difficult—near impossible. I still believed I was a normal drinker and normal drinkers can …
Read more →Spirituality is a controversial topic in general, but a particularly heated topic for newly recovering addicts. If I am a believer it’s a non-issue. If I’m not a believer it can make or break my future. Do I need to see to believe or do I believe to …
Read more →I love drinking. Drinking makes me feel better. Drinking is the answer. Drinking is the question. Drinking is fun. I’m more interesting when I’m drinking. Alcohol is only a problem when there isn’t enough. Life is better with a drink. My family loves it when I’m drinking.
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