Being an addict can feel, initially, like obligatory reflection. Reflection—one of the things that drives us to drink in the first place. We aren’t good feelers. As I look back on my early recovery I can see that everything was exacerbated. Good feelings were REALLY good and bad …
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Alcoholic
I wrote my life in ink, not pencil. I can go back and strike through it, but it can never be undone—erased. I can’t choose yesterday again. Erasers remove the error on my son’s math homework, they do not eliminate, or fix, my yesterday. My yesterday is un-alterable. …
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Ever wonder why you don’t understand sober people? Today’s post is a mini-lesson in making sense of applying another’s advice, suggestion, or philosophy to your recovery. What they say: What is means: …
Read more →If your new year resolution was to get sober, one of two things has happened. I am hopeful, for you, that it was success—statistics suggest otherwise. If you find yourself in the “I’ve relapsed” category there is still good news. Failure provides us with an accurate gauge for …
Read more →Somehow, somewhere, someway, I have felt that Creator has forgotten about me. While I know (in the truest part of me) this is not possible, I have still fallen prey to this mindset on more than one occasion this past month. The culmination of an ant infestation, an …
Read more →I love to beat myself up over every little thing I don’t get quite right. The words were thoughtless, the syntax confusing, the tone ambiguous, should have exercised, or shouldn’t have eaten that. I live with regret, despite that I am now taught otherwise. Am I to not regret the …
Read more →The longer I am sober the more I appreciate the darkness. It forces me to engage. It forces me to see things anew. The very notion of darkness implies that I will need to interact in an unfamiliar manner. The goal has always been to get out of …
Read more →The problems I eliminated when I stopped drinking: My alcohol related problems. Every other problem, challenge, irritation, life lesson, ache, or issue was still waiting to greet me—without the luxury of a drink. What felt like my life becoming worse with each sober day was the reality of …
Read more →Where’s mine? This was the basic theme of my life. My whole life. Especially through early sobriety. If I was going to have to give up alcohol and suffer the horrors of an alcohol-free life I was deserved of some type of compensation. After all, it wasn’t fair …
Read more →Where are those magic words? Those words that let the reader know I understand. I understand where you are, but if you can just trust there is another way, I promise there is. Active alcoholism, especially when in it, is the worst kind of torture. Non-addicts have no …
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