I can’t versus I won’t

Most addicts (notice I didn’t say “all”) have a tendency to confuse not being able to do something with not being willing to do something. The difference is measurable. Can’t implies that I cannot get it done no matter how I hard or how often I put forth effort. The objective is impossible to reach. In effect, it is impossible based on the fact that we live in a three dimensional world.

A Good Example: No matter how hard I try I cannot jump and land on the moon.
A Poor Example: No matter how hard I try I cannot get and stay sober.

I won’t means that I am not willing. The possibility exists and I am not willing to pursue this or any new option. It means that it is possible, but based on my current frame of mind, it is not going to happen.

A Good Example: I won’t take that first drink because I know that it solves NOTHING!
A Poor Example: I have to take that first drink because it’s my only option.

Our body isn’t doing something that our mind isn’t telling it to do. If we don’t like how we are behaving then we get to change our mind. Simple, but not always easy.

When I learn the difference between these two I will be well on my way to reprogramming my mind. It takes time, discipline, and effort. There is no shortcut key to lasting sobriety and healthy thinking. I begin today by noticing when I won’t do something. Yes, the whole day. Notice all the things I’m not willing to do when they cross my mind.
Examples: Get out of bed when the alarm goes off. Say morning prayers.Eat a healthy breakfast. Fold the laundry.

It’s 7:00 and I am already in the wrong mindset. It’s okay, I will learn if I keep moving forward.

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